Quest


Last night we had a little party to say good-bye to some friends who are moving.  There are so many reasons I am mourning this loss.  Change is much harder for me now that I’ve had cancer.  I don’t bounce back the way I used to.  I’m a little angry at Nick for thinking he needs a Doctorate in Philosophy because he’s taking my friend away from me.  I think if Jeremy and I work hard enough we could rise to the challenge of arguing….oh wait….I mean “reasoning” totally useless knowledge.  I think he should reconsider.

Nick and Penni have really only been here for two years.  We met when they came to our church shortly after they moved here for Nick to get his master’s degree.  We hit it off quickly and enjoyed discussing things like “global warming” and “creation care” with them.  And the one thing I have loved about them is that they like entertaining discussion and aren’t shocked by much of anything either.  We can just throw it out there and mull it around and not think we’re heretics for thinking about it or questioning the status quo in the church.

It was almost exactly three months after we met them that I received my diagnosis of inflammatory breast cancer.  I remember the prayer service my church had for me the week after my diagnosis and they came up to talk to me after the service and I looked at them and thought “what a crappy friend I am.”  I’ve known them for three months and then I go and get cancer…..and to be honest, I really believed I was going to die, so I thought….”now they get to watch me die.”  I know this is morbid, but it’s my recolection of past thoughts in those initial days so it just is what it is.

So, during these two years, I have battled cancer (and won, praise Jesus), Penni had another baby…..and somehow I managed to talk them into letting me teach them how to do it naturally.  And craziness, Penni agreed!  And not only that but she did it! 

As they go I am reminded how important it is for us to nurture friendship.  I recently got an iphone.  I think it’s quite possible I could play with it most of the day.  More and more I find myself spending time on this computer or my new iphone and I have realized my relationships are suffering.  I don’t want to be interrupted when I’m writing important things on my blog, or when I’ve decided I need useless information from google.  Crazy how our quest for information has trumped our basic need for friendship and connected-ness with others.

I’m getting ready to preach this Sunday at church and I’ll be sharing from Luke 10, when Mary chooses to sit and learn at Jesus’ feet rather than help Martha in the kitchen.

We struggle in this media crazy world to temper our quest for entertainment and knowledge with simple personal interaction.

Loving God and loving people.

So today, as I prepare to say goodbye to my friends, I’m also pondering my habits and reflecting on what it means to sit at the feet of Jesus and choose intimacy over busy-ness.

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